I’m sorry for the break in posts – Uni duties!
I realise that I’ve talked a lot about the depressive part of Bipolar but not very much about the mania – reason being, folks, is because the depressive side is a little easier to accept. People develop their own opinions about mania based on how irrational someone’s behaviour is. I’ll give you a lowdown on what it’s like to be manic:
1. You have absolutely no need to sleep, your mind is running at 500km per hour and you simply cannot shut it down. You can also function on little/no sleep
2. You get really “passionate” about your opinions and argue the heck if someone doesn’t agree with you. Sadly this always the case with my mania. My dad and brother have very traditional catholic views about how homosexuals shouldn’t be able to get married which I argue the toss about, and I am less tolerant of my brother watching every morsel of food I put in my mouth than usual, which leads to a lot of screaming and crying.
3. I want to save the world. Everyone who knows me behind the blog world knows I have strong ambitions to end bullying forever and whatnot, but only my family know I sponsor a child in Ethiopia. I decided to sponsor when I was manic because I decided the $43 a month donation plan was more productive than an iPhone plan – not that there’s anything wrong with iPhone plans! – without considering that I earn a minimum wage at a retail store in a department I LOATHE (shoes), and I live away from home half the week so I need money then. So far I haven’t had too many problems with the sponsorship and I get a great boost of self-esteem when I know I’m helping a child in poverty, HOWEVER I just wish I’d waited until after uni.
4. I’m much more gossipy when I’m managed and while I was under a lot of stress adjusting to life away from home in 2010 I am ashamed to admit that I engaged in bitchy behaviours without considering the effects on that particular person. This is one of the reasons I’d never want to lose control of my mouth (with alcohol or any substance) because in a way being manic is very similar to being drunk – aggression, tears and all.
The worst part about mania is I often don’t realise I’m manic until Mum asks me if I’m sick. I was born with craziness in my A Positive blood. Not singing in the shower is uncharacteristic for me and I have some ridiculous mannerisms that I blame my father for – so you may have realized that I don’t fancy being “high”.
Sorry about the essay, guys!
Over and out.